so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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