Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
