I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
we should paint friendship bongs
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