Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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