I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
