I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Randomize
