is your mom at the bar?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
