There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize