I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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