I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
