Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
