Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize