I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
