Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I'm having to shit out rocks
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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