I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
