Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize