im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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