Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
