I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
