Porn is love you can see.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
