am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize