I cannot find my penis.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
