How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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