yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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