i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
