I've blown a few things in my day
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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