She said her name was "party"
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Randomize
