Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
