Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
