btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
