you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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