Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
