It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
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