i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
This baby is an asshole
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
