she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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