I can tuck mytits in my pants
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
