Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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