Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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