she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
