i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
