YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
