Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize