I wish I could teleport
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
