Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Randomize
