And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
