On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
