Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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