u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
