Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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