You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
